Sunday, June 17, 2007

I am exhausted

Seriously exhausted. Day 3 of driving to and from Victoria and I am so dog dead tired right now. We left early so that I could take Randy for breakfast along the way, it being Father's Day and all. Stopped in Duncan at White Spot - it was packed. Propped my eyelids open while we waited for our breakfast. then off to an 11am appt with Caroline - yes she made a special appt for me since she was meeting another client for acu at VFC. Well she called at like 1050 and said don't rush, she was stuck at VFC. So we sauntered over to the mall to get Jessica her 'grad' dress for Wednesday. Did some browsing and then made our way back over to the office as Caroline had opened it for me earlier. She called about 1145 to tell me to come to VFC as they wanted to squeeze me in and she would go back to the office and wait for me. I felt so bad but she was totally okay with it. So off to VFC and OMG, do they ever look tired. Hectic week for them to say the least. D Spence was very funny today. "Just waiting for the 'goo' Tammi". I asked if that was the technical name for it LOL. Then in with the coochie cam and he said " wow look at that puppy!". Tammi laughed and said wow we have goo and a puppy, interesting day LOL.

Follies are not really matching up with Friday but whatever, here were today's numbers:
R=10, 13, 16, 16, 17, 18, 19, 22
L=7, 13, 17
Lining is 10.3 woot

Now here is the ultimate kick in the stomach though. Before we started this cycle I said, we cannot be in the clinic Weds the 20th because it is Jessica's grad. Guess when he wants me to trigger? Sigh. I really don't know what to do. He is making me come back AGAIN tomorrow morning at the crack ass of dawn (forgive my language I am tired and can't control it anymore) for E2 and a scan in Victoria (as in be in Victoria by 7am). He said if we hadn't mentioned no to Weds (actually Tammi said she cannot be here Weds am and he said he wasn't comfortable triggering me tonight) he was going to just tell us to trigger tomorrow night but now he is leaving it up to Dr H. I don't know why we couldn't trigger tonight - they are all a good size aren't they? He said it will be up to "Stephen" to make the decision for me.

I asked Tammi afterwards what she thought and she said well we will do what we can, we did know about this before but we won't sacrifice the cycle either. So it will be in my good doctors hands. It won't be a great morning - they are already doubled booked from 8am on so who knows how long I will be there. I am aiming to hit the MDS lab @ 7 and VFC for 8.

How can I choose between my daughter and my future babies? OMG this sucks even more since I seem to have no coping mechanism left right now. And I have to drive AGAIN. Dang every bump kills and I am sick of that freaking drive. This will be #5 in less than a week. Plus Randy won't be there so when he tells me that I have to trigger and miss her grad I am sure I will just melt into a big pile of tears and lose it and STILL have to drive home.

Ugh hormones SUCK!

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